May Day, Democracy Now

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I rarely come her to look at the tumblr, but when I do…oh boy

New project I am starting

Hard drives are cool

I just flew in from Virginia, and boy is my vagina tired! From the involuntary ultrasound wanding — AM I RIGHT, LADIES? (Beat.) And by the way, why do they call it a ‘wand’? Where are we — Hogwarts? The only thing magically disappearing was my dignity and privacy, BOOM!!!

…What’s the difference between a fertilized egg; a corporation; and a woman? (Beat.) One of them isn’t considered a person in Oklahoma! BOOM!!!
KRISTEN SCHAAL, on The Daily Show (via inothernews)

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This is what it’s like to play MTG with me